The healing work can be lonely, uncomfortable and exhausting! If we allow ourselves to get caught up in the analysis; why am I sick, how can I let go, what can I do to get better? Our discomfort often brings out the discomfort in others and then they avoid you, or ask questions that you cannot answer, they trigger you as you trigger them. After all we are all just mirrors for one another!
We miss out on the most important part of it all ~ the reason! Why are we putting in this work to better ourselves? What is your why?
My initial why was to be able to live a life that didn't make me feel so depressed, to have some kind of joy and love, to no longer be in chronic widespread mother fucking pain!!!!
The why changes overtime, sure, but the fundamental need to live the life I want is still there. So how do we go from the difficult work to the life we want?
Put it all into practice!
You want more joy, find things that give you joy and include more of that in your life, make time for it, experiment, get to know yourself all over again. Revisit things you loved as a child!
If you are seeking more love, start by loving yourself more. Develop a deeper self awareness about the things that make you feel loved, how you show love, how you would like to receive love. What was missing from your childhood? Give that to yourself!!
Whatever your goals are for your healing journey it starts within, getting to know and understand yourself better, and this doesn't have to be difficult and exhausting. Think of yourself as a new friend, how would you get to know that new friend? What would you do with that new friend? How would you speak to and treat that new friend? How would you like that new friend to treat you?
As I embark on my third year of healing fibromyalgia, depression and so much more I am reminded of the early work, the difficult journey I went through to get to where I am now ~ drug free, sober, not even remotely depressed, living my life more in alignment with myself. Yet there is work to be done, there is room to grow, there is always going to be more healing. Accepting that takes a lot of the difficulty and struggle out of it.
Accepting yourself as you are now doesn't mean you don't strive for change, it isn't blind love, you are accepting all parts of you and accepting that you want more out of life. Accepting and loving yourself is the way!
So I ask you again; what is your why? The how will follow
Much love x