Healing through Creative Expression, Self Awareness and Acceptance
Hi! I'm Trips
Healing chronic pain, insomnia, perfectionism and severe clinical depression (to name a few) changed my life and I am here to help people heal and change their lives too!
Growing up I was very creative; drawing, needlepoint and writing stories, it was always so much fun and I was very proud of the things I made.
From as young as three years old I have had widespread pain. It was a running joke in the family to ask me “what doesn’t hurt”. But the sad truth is I had no idea what pain-free felt like and I did not love myself or my body.
As a perfectionist and high achieving people pleaser, I focused on studying hard, going to University, getting a good job etc. You know, all the "things" that mean you have a good life!
Even though I achieved good grades, I didn’t feel like it was enough, constantly pushing myself and striving for perfection. Feeling unworthy of love from myself and others, people pleasing and neglecting myself.
At 20 years old, I was diagnosed with severe, clinical depression and anxiety as well as insomnia, and the pain was getting worse. I didn’t believe healing was a possibility, I didn’t try, I just kept pushing myself.
After my Master’s degree I got my dream job as an andrologist, a male fertility scientist, and moved to London. I was so excited, but my body and mind had other plans! Getting progressively sicker! I didn’t love myself enough to take care of myself. I continued studying; my second Bachelor’s degree, even though I was working 40+ hours. As well as trying to have an active social life. Burning the candle at both ends and in the middle!
I was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue syndromes as well as hypermobility and costochondritis. I was given opiates to manage the symptoms and told I would never heal and only get worse. That I did!
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This continued for a few more years; pushing myself, burn outs, flares, hospital and doctor visits, tears and anger, and feeling like life was unfair. Finally, I had no choice but to move back home to my parent’s house, leaving my job, my friends and my life as I knew it.
I was isolated and depressed more than ever before, often bed bound and still burning myself out! I didn’t know who I was and all I had left were the chronic and mental illnesses that were the only constant in my life.
I designed this leopard print jacket
Finally, I got back into creative hobbies! I started to write poetry to express myself. I began going to art classes (it turns out I have a talent for drawing flowers). I am knitting and baking again, as well as trying out new creative things.
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In 2020 during the first lockdown I was bed bound for weeks at a time. It was at this time that I had enough and invested in my healing. I got a therapist, a bodymind coach and a cognitive behavioural therapist and started the deep healing work.
This helped me to unravel the trauma, find root causes behind the symptoms and why they were manifesting, and what I can do to keep healing.
Within 6 months I was able to radically change my life
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I healed the severe clinical depression and anxiety.
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I healed insomnia and now have an amazing relationship with sleep!
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I recognised my self worth is not tied in with how perfect I am, or how others see me.
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I learnt perfection is not real and I continue finding ways to reframe how I do things.
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I allowed fun and playfulness back into my life, connecting with my inner child.
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I started to be more creative, learning new skills and I allowed myself to experiment.
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I finally know what pain-free feels like!
